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2Spare - 50 funniest Homer Simpson Quotes

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Saved by 13 people (-7 private), first by anonymouse user on 2007-02-15


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50 funniest Homer Simpson Quotes

Highlighted by gazbryn825

Operator! Give me the number for 911!

Highlighted by gazbryn825


  • Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!

    • Highlighted by nandahitz

    Oh, so they have internet on computers now!

    Highlighted by gazbryn825

  • Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!

  • Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand.

  • I'm normally not a praying man, but if you're up there, please save me Superman.

  • Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.

  • Well, it's 1 a.m. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids.

  • Maybe, just once, someone will call me 'Sir' without adding, 'You're making a scene.'

  • Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel.

  • Doughnuts. Is there anything they can't do?

  • You know, boys, a nuclear reactor is a lot like a woman. You just have to read the manual and press the right buttons.

  • Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

    • Highlighted by gazbryn825

    When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV!

    Highlighted by nandahitz


  • [Meeting Aliens] Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them!

    • Highlighted by nandahitz

    I'm having the best day of my life, and I owe it all to not going to Church!

    Highlighted by nandahitz